now i know why

No words to express how i feel...i wonder why must i know wats wrong when its too late.
so the reasons u are upset are...
1. I was upset u going to meet that guy that likes u, when i ownself met von....
2. I broke up the second time with u cos your phone ran out of batt and 'thought' that u went to meet him....
3. I broke up with u the first time cos u sat with lylyq while i side alicia and dapy
4. I trained hero and ignore u for 5 days, maybe more, promised to pei u but i didn't
5. I was behaving very close with nuer, like saying ily to her

the reason i am upset....
1. U told me everything is okay, and nothing happen, but u cant let go wat had happened
2. U smsed me 1/2 words only, stopped smsing me when u wake up, ignores me a lot
3. I saw your blog and some content really made me feels that ur hiding things from me
4. It sucks to feel that u no longer love me

all i can say is, i am really sorry bby for not knowing how u feel....i shouldn't have neglected u and sometimes i am being unreasonable like stopping u from meeting your friend, but...i am just afraid to lose u, then why did i break with u...its cos i thought it might make u treasure me again but it didn't.

my love towards you never stopped, i will prove to u by actions from now on...
tmr will be my quitting sales....for a start..

Revived

Noticed its been quite some time since i last blogged. I decided to revive it cos i realised i missed out so much in life which i probably would have forgotten by now...so instead of living each day as it is, i decided to cont this blog.

I woke up at 10 and i took a look at my hp, she didn't sms me...a bit dissapointed that its my cousin instead. My phone's clock is still 30mins fast ahead, lazy to change it, the sms' time i received is actually more accurate, wtf. Then i got up, not cos of maple thank god, cos of the sudden stomach ach....glad we smsed :D

Duno why u bad mood today, and keep busy nowadays, but i hope its not cos u stopped loving me, its driving me crazy thinking that u will be gone....

ay called me today, i know yesterday was our anniversary...as in ex anniversary. She seems really upset for not giving a shit abt it, but wat am i suppose to do, some things are just over and cannot be the same anymore...

maple isn't fun anymore, i saw my eqs and asked myeslf, wtf i spend 3k on it only to realised...it doesn't matter if ur pro or noob, maple is still boring...

Just 1 week

Long time since i blog again. I hope today will be fine. Basically for those who duno i got into this CCA called racing kayak. So...last week i got kicked out by coach cos he say i sian sian during training though i was like chionging all the way...he just says no fire in the eye.

So just as i got over it, i received an sms saying coach wans me back to the team. I went back only to know that for me to get back into the team, i must GO CHURCH WITH HIM, AND BRING 3 PERSON IN THE TEAM ALONG, if not, I CANT GET BACK IN THE TEAM.

Everyone thinks its not right for him to do so but who dare voice out? Well...he says that the pastor will help change me...change to a better person. Is it wrong trying be a soloer? Why do i have to stick with the team all along even dinner? i have my own life and double training 7am to 12pm and 4.30pm to 7pm daily is ady taking most of my time away. KNOW WAT IS THE MEANING OF NO LIFE?! And i ady tried my best to please the rest of the team.

Furthermore, coach says there is low chance i can catch up with the rest due to so many training missed.

I wonder.....should i return or quit?

why i did that?!

Today was fine, went to work at 3pm, made appointments and recuitments.
Until at night i duno wats wrong with me, i just......
Forgot it, i dun wana talk abt it haiz...
Anyway, tmr will be pakour 101, woot!!! (should call it today since its alr 12.15am)

Update

Sorry for killing my own blog everyone...i will try put a post every once a week or more xD
Enrolled into TP, taking law&management, WOOHOO!
Just completed my enrollment online, going for medical check up at 3pm yeah!~(hope i am healthy as ever)
I also got a job in VE(venture era), its about sales and its not gona be easy cos its unstable though other various working conditions were good :D
Meanwhile, i registered for freerun101, its a parkour showcase FOR FREE! i believe i can learn something there beyond the internet and maybe, i may even sign up for parkour training...LOLS xDxDxD (check out www.urbanfreestyle.sg for more info)
Last of all, I MISS SCHOOL AND CCA!!!! i remembered i was feeling the opposite when i was in school...guess this is what they call 'u will treasure things when u loss them'. But i not lossing them because i can also come back mf to visit my juniors and teachers xD, asap!

PrOm NiGhT

okay start with the good part. I rushed during afternoon to get a shirt...$75. Then went to prom with a overly-small sized shoes, by the time i reach there the my heel aready bleeding...open wound. I hid my pain throughout, not easy...T.T
I saw Amos and was happy he was dressed well, dam cool XD. In the ballroom, I sat beside Zheng Yang and Fu En. Zheng Yang kept finding fault with me and hitting my head[he was playing and I dun mind] LOLS. Then there was the couple dance, remembered clearly Jia Qi and Qi Hua won. My class was seriously WTF, they chosen me and Li Kiong...I would have danced if they get a REAL GIRL! But nvm, it was real fun and funny. We ate and talk and stuff then. Then lucky draw and magic tricks. Near the end, everyone danced together, more lik jumping hahax. Imagine me jumping with a open wound in the heel, bleeding, cool huh?
My pain eased upon seeing 'her'.
I wanted to talk to her, but i can't bring myself to...
At final moment, just as i almost go all out, i saw Winston and talked to him about it, he meant I dun stand a chance...
So i gave up and took a taxi home, every second I could feel my heart shrinking and drowning with sorrow. Its only my fault that I screwed things up...if only i have been a better person since sec 1, things would have been a breeze. But oh well, throught failure we learn. No point grumbling and regret, its time to get out of my fantasy dreams and set things right!

HoPe AnD FaTe In ThE HaNdS Of ThE MiGhTy GoD

Its been like centuries since i blogged. Main reason is because I am in the midst of my most important exams in life so far, the O levels. I expecting english to get B3 and maths to be A2...
But I prayed for my maths for a A1 cause it will really make life easier for me as that means I need to scored A1 for D&T, A1 for combined humanities and A2 for either chinese or science. This is mainly because I planning to go to TP, for psychology course which needs L1R4 to be 8 points only!!! well, thats one of the most difficult course to enter for any poly. Benjamin persuaided me to go to a JC, but I dun like the idea of JC. Firstly, I have to cut my hair! NO WAY! Secondly, still have to wear a UNIFORM! NO WAY! Lastly, the subjects are going to be boring and limited. Furthermore, I dropped amath, so I will have a real disadvantage if i go JC.

Actually there is another alternative, I can go to NP for psychology & community services which need L1R4 to be 10. BUT IF ALL ELSE FAIL, then I will probably take benjamin's advice and go JC. God bless me!